There are folks out there who believe that marriage is more of a science than an art — and they say that they can pretty much predict who will end up divorced. While there are always “outliers” in any scientific study, experts who have been studying the statistics on marriage and divorce say that the following factors heavily influence a marriage’s longevity:
Your age when you marry
People who marry as teenagers and people who put off marriage until they’re well over 30 are more likely to divorce. Those who marry as teens may not have enough time to really settle on what they want out of a partner. Those who wait too long may simply grow fond of a life without the compromises required by a spouse.
An unemployed or under-employed husband
It’s interesting, but true, that an unemployed or under-employed wife doesn’t affect a marriage’s stability but the same can’t be said when the husband isn’t working (or doesn’t work full time). This doesn’t include, however, situations where the husband stays home to care for the kids.
The way that you argue
There are good ways and bad ways to disagree with you spouse. If you can argue or disagree without behaving like a victim, attacking your spouse’s character or blocking all communication, your marriage is far more likely to survive. Most importantly, marriages where one spouse treats the other with contempt are probably doomed.
Your expectations for romance at the start
Starting out a relationship all starry-eyed is somewhat expected. However, couples that carry it to an extreme often end up divorced later — while couples that temper their emotions a little at the start end up happier. Why? Probably because that hormonal feeling at the start of a new relationship isn’t sustainable. When it wears off, the let-down is hard for some people to handle.
Stress can really damage a relationship — especially if one or both members of a couple can’t handle it well. Surprisingly, it isn’t major events that trigger breakups. It’s the daily grind of constant low-level stress that kills marriages.
If you’re worried about your marriage, consider counseling if you think that there’s a possibility you can work things out. If it is past that point, a discussion with a family lawyer can often help you decide what you want to do next.
Source: businessinsider.com, “8 things science says predict divorce,” Shana Lebowitz, accessed April 05, 2018